giovedì, agosto 24, 2006
La mappa del condominio: II puntata
  • Piano terra: al piano terra abita La Cagnara. Lei divide la sua vita con un mastino napoletano con eccessi di salivazione e asma cronico, da cui non si separerebbe mai. Non ha un fidanzato e non frequenta persone che non abbiano una passione sfrenata per gli amici a quattrozampe. Il salivatore asmatico si chiama Bull e ha la simpatica abitudine di piazzarti le zampe sulla pancia in segno di saluto, sbavando sulle tue scarpe appena messe. Lei lo ama così tanto che non va nemmeno in vacanza pur di non abbandonarlo alle cure di qualche cattivone. La Cagnara ha circa 40 anni.


  • Primo piano: come in un antro della strega, La Tedescona vive nella sua grotta difesa da alte sbarre cancellate. Lei - algida - si nutre di cuori umani, preferendo quelli dei bambini... Non tollera nessun rumore che provenga dal di lei soffitto e si aggira per casa con una scopa, pronta a battere ad ogni fruscio fuori luogo. Alla bisogna sfodera una voce da soprano che utilizza per cazziare tutti coloro che nel condominio non si comportano come dovrebbero...

  • Secondo piano: Sopra La Tedescona vive una famigliola di 6 persone "Gli esotici". Loro vengono da un punto indeterminato del mappamondo, sito tra l'Asia e l'Europa. Parlano una lingua strana e hanno figli talmente educati da risultare quasi finti. Oggetto del razzismo collettivo e frustrato del palazzo, Panzallaria li adora tutti, dai mignon alle donnone con le palle. La Tedescona tenta ogni giorno di convincerli (con le cattive) ad andarsene dal Palazzo, ma si sa...l'intelligenza ha sempre la meglio!

  • A fianco degli Esotici vivo io, cioé Panzallaria. Insieme a Tino stiamo creando una piccola azienda familiare. Gravida, a dicembre arriverà Frollina e cresceremo di numero e di braccia. Al momento dividiamo la magione con ilgattoscemo e lagattasciancata, principini della casa, ignari di quel che succederà con l'arrivo del Feto trionfante... Tino è anche detto Furber King (per la sua furbizia innata), Uomo attrezzo e romantic man.
  • Palazzo di fronte: la finestra di fronte a quella di Panzallaria è occupata dal Gelataiomatto e dal figlio Droghello. Le avventure di questa simpatica famigliola sono oggetto dei morbosi appostamenti notturni di Panzallaria, quando le luci disegnano ombre sui muri e frammenti di conversazione fan congetturare gli animi...

  • L'altro portone nel cortile: affaccia sul cortile la terrazza della Magda: personaggio inquietante di donna settantenne che non accetta di invecchiare. Magda gira in cortile con il suo cane, una vestaglia e le babbucce rosa, i bigodini a tenere i capelli biondo platino e un'abbronzatura da campione, frutto delle lampade di cui settimanalmente usufruisce al centro estetico all'angolo. La Magda si sente tanto buona e ama tanto gli animali, tranne suo marito e gli altri esseri umani.Sa tutto di tutti. Registra ogni cosa e fiuta il morto prima che esali l'ultimo respiro. Tollerante coi forti e arrogante coi deboli, la Magda è proprio una gran persona!
  • Il bar Roma: il bar dove Panzallaria ama far colazione, disquisire di calcio e amenità varie, leggere i quotidiani a scrocco, mangiare la Luisona appena sfornata e cazzeggiare per l'aperitivo con qualche amico di passaggio.

  • Comparse sparse:il bambinoindemoniato, la stranacoppia, la famigliainvisibile.
 
posted by Panzallaria at 6:31 PM | Permalink |


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